Steve came home with a bouqet of beautiful tulips for me yesterday because he knew how much I was struggling. They were beautiful and just a little glimmer of hope that Spring would be here soon and that the world wasn't the grey depressing place that it felt. The thing about yesterday was I felt selfish and really single minded as I refused to think about the awful thing that had happened to our friends. I came to realize that I wasn't being selfish at all, I am continuing to pray for them and I left my regards for them. There isn't a whole lot more I can do for them and obsessing over what happened will only upset me. So I didn't actually do anything wrong. Life isnt fair, and sometimes it sucks but I can only do my best to make it a better place.
Today we went into town and it was nice! Our little family unit walking about looking in shops getting just the normal things we need and then going and having a coffee and panini in The Cheesecake Shop, I felt like I had to keep reafirming how grateful I was for my family to Steve so I kept hugging him and snuggling Mags. I am just so happy to be alive and be free to live the life that I live. I am blessed.
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