I choose

to be positive

I choose to live my life today with a smile on my face

I choose to not let the fatigue get me down and wear me into the ground

I choose to be ecstatic that I am 33+1 today and that I have come so far!

I choose not to be sad over news I found out last night inolving to very close friends of mine...

I choose to stand up today and say "you know what life can be really shitty but heck if I am going to let it ta me laying down!" 

I am sitting here peering over my bump marveling at the fact that I am nearly at the end of my pregnancy. I honestly didn't know if I would make it this far. I really and truely have been taking it one day at a time. I went back in to the hospital on Monday and I have shrunk but I hadn't been for 4 weeks and I had only shrunk to 4. Ok, so to most women pregnant at 33 weeks having a cervical canal measuring 4mm would be terrifying but I am not concerned. It's odd the sense of calm that I have felt this entire pregnancy...with Maggie I was stressed the whole time and so upset about if I had eaten the right things or drunk too much 7-up, or slept on the wrong side. This time around? I have literally just let go and let God. And when I do that it's an amazing experience one I would recomend to eveyone.  Allowing Him to take over and take my concerns, my worry and my stress is like saying "ok so my life is chaos but here you can deal wth it" and the funny thing is? He does deal with it.  I found out the baby is a really healthy weight already weighing in at 4lb12oz so almost twice what Maggie was when she was born....this ups my chances of holding her at birth and ups my chances to breast feed as I will be able to have more skin to skin with her. I am now looking forward to my mom getting here in 2 weeks :) yay!  I am desperate to stay pregnant for 3 more weeks at least just so she can have the full "pregnant mara" effect lol because everyone should get to experience me pregnant at some point...lol ;) ok well it is naptime and I am shattered so....love to all of you! xx M